The last nine days had been a blur. We went and saw Depeche Mode at the Hammersmith Odeon. It was a fantastic show, but watching it with Ava made it even better as we sang along. Of course, I got us backstage to meet the band, but we only stuck around briefly as Ava and I had other plans.
We spent the next day at the house, and Ava had my art inspiration going, so I asked her to sit for me, and she did. I even managed to work on the long-forgotten painting for my mum, which caused me to spend most of the day in the art studio.
We flew to Scotland and took in the sites, including Sunday’s Water Boys and U2 concert at the Edinburgh Playhouse. We went backstage briefly but took off as I had an early morning radio show that I had to be ready for and a little fun with the wife. The best part was Ava being by my side for it all.
After a few days in Scotland doing press, we went to Italy and then back to London. While I wish we could’ve gotten out and explored, I knew there would’ve been no peace. Ava seemed to handle most of it well, but she was quiet, and I knew she was trying to wrap her mind around the madness. That was part of the reason I didn’t stay for the after-parties at the shows, which I usually would’ve. I knew we had to reconnect and be there for each other every night. Mel and I never did that, but I knew Ava, and I needed it, or maybe I just did. I needed to feel her comfort and faith in me, to honestly know someone loved me for me.
During the whole ten days, I had to flip on that fake bravado, that person everyone saw me as. Yet every night when it was just her and me, I got to be myself. Even on a certain level with the guys, I don’t get to be me. I have to play my role, be the sex symbol, but I don’t want that anymore, and I know I can’t just turn it off. That guy was part of me now. I poured a finger of scotch as I thought about how desperate I had been to become the man I was. While I loved my job, I wasn’t sure about all the adoration that came with it, especially when they went after Ava. I took a sip, set it on the adjacent stool next to the bottle, and returned to painting.
There was a knock on the door frame, and I turned and saw Ava. “Terry said the stylist, makeup, and hair person will be here in twenty minutes.”
I nodded. “Come here,” I said as I held my hand toward her. “Are you okay?”
She smiled as she moved closer. “It’s your big night, so of course. I know how to stand by your side and look at you adoringly,” she batted her eyes at me.
“You know you’re not just arm candy.” I pulled her closer to me as she came to stand between my legs.
She leaned down and slowly kissed me. “I know, but for tonight, it’s okay if I am. I’m sure there will be nights when the reverse might be true. You can be my walking cock.”
I started laughing as she ran her hand over the front of my pants. “I’m not sure we have time.”
“I know. I just want you to remember that we’ll have a lovely celebration for two after everything tonight.”
I leaned up and kissed her. “It definitely will be a night to remember.”
***
I was dressed in a tux with tails, and Rosie had managed to get the Dior gown shipped as I had asked. I was confident we would make the best-dressed list in some fashion sections in the papers or magazines this week.
“Are you sure I look okay?” Ava asked suddenly.
I knew by the look on her face she was feeling insecure. I brought our hands to my lips and kissed hers. “You look beautiful.”
“Thank you. You look beautiful, too.” She laughed nervously. “I mean, handsome.”
I smirked at her. Her insecurity was cute and reminded me of myself just starting out. “There’s no reason to be nervous.”
“While we walked the airports together, this time it’s different,” she said.
“It is. This time, for the most part, we will be in friendly territory. PR usually advises the reporters before we step up on what they are allowed to ask. So tonight is our formal introduction as Nigel Hartagan and Ava Richards.” I took a beat. “You sure you don’t want to take my name?”
“I told you I don’t want people to think I married you because of your name and the doors it might open,” she said.
“Whether you take my name or not, people know. Think about it,” I said.
“It’s just I’ve been Ava Richards for eighteen years.”
“Come on, when you fantasized about me in high school, weren’t you Ava Hartagan?”
She blushed a little, “Mindy told you, didn’t she?”
“She may have let it slip, but please don’t be mad at her. She just told me you fantasized about us getting married. Nothing more. You’re the one that told me about the limo.” I gave her hand a light squeeze as I caressed her cheek. “It would mean a lot if you would take Hartagan, even if you just do it privately.”
She nodded her head as she spoke. “Okay, I’ll do it. You’re right. They all know anyway. So if doors are going to open, they'll open. So tell whoever that we’re Nigel and Ava Hartagan.”
I gave her a wide smile before I kissed her cheek. I didn’t want to smear her makeup. “Nigel and Ava Hartagan, I like the sound of that.” I did because the truth was everyone would know she was mine. Russell would understand that Ava and I were a team and couldn’t dictate our lives even if he had a contract. More importantly, though, I would never have to fear I would become Mr. Richards like I had in my coma.
